You know the type.  Unless you’ve been living under a rock or maybe if you’re still being treated for that rare allergy to Pabst Blue Ribbon, you definitely can relate to these folks.  Seriously, what is your deal, Mr. Hipster? Were the jocks and beautiful people in high school too vapid to “get you?” Guess what, no amount of thrift shop store-credits will ever mask your insecurity, Dude.

Take those skin-tight jeans you’re wearing, Mr. Hipster. You ain’t comfortable, so what are you trying to prove, exactly, that toite vintage denim cuts off the circulation to your feet? We’re not suggesting you should be General Larry Platt’ing it up, just leave a little breathing room in case you ever want to spawn a child. On second thought…

See, e.g. the average hipster male of today, predominantly residing in Brooklyn, NY.  A fresh pair of stonewashed skinny jeans begins the outfit.  The testicles haven’t dropped yet because there is no way they could fit inside those pants.   Next, you’ll note the pair of slip-on Vans.  Non-prescription thick-rimmed glasses and a coat made famous by Starsky and Hutch round out the uniform. Ugh.

Now, Mr. Hipster, you say you are “anti-corporate America.”  You claim to be original in everything you do, from your uniform to your musical tastes to your bicycle riding.  But actually, Sir, you’re a virtual mirror image of your hipster clansmen! Hipsters ride their bamboo-frame bicycles to the next borough, just to visit Whole Foods.  Hipsters always have one or two Republican friends, so they can say that they do.  Hipsters love the 70’s and 80’s, but many weren’t even born then. Hipsters scoff at the “mainstream”, but  the sad irony is that hipsters ARE mainstream nowadays.  They’re like a  Fraternity, hated by all, admired by none. Welcome to Williamsburg, or should be call it Predictaville, USA.

If we still had time to play Nintendo, we would.  And you wanna know why?  Because it’s glorious, not because it’s from the 80’s! Hipsters love organic food, and that’s fine at first glance.  After watching Food, Inc. we certainly look at our local grocer in a much different light.  That said, we’re not trying to appease a group of so-called friends, or to be included in “Going Green Gang.”.

The point here is that we need more originality.  We’re not saying people should break the law or quit their jobs (just to be original), but more creativity wouldn’t hurt anyone. Imagine a world where we all started dressing, acting, and conducting ourselves like hipsters. Who would be left to work at a job? Who would listen to and make good music?  Who would be comfortable in their pants? Take LessThis as prime example. We started this thing as a creative outlet for talented writers to blast the Interwebs with our rants, political opinions, and points of view in a manner that encourages open communication with our readers. If we were hipsters, we’d still be just talking about what a good idea this site would be.